Ever had a bad day?
Not a bad day like you locked your keys in your car and showed up fifty-four minutes late for work, only to pass by the obnoxious new guy drinking the last cup of the best coffee while flirting with the cute secretary you’ve been working up the courage to ask out.
I mean downright awful, like you locked your keys in your car, and just as the AMA guy shows up, a freak windstorm picks up your car, tosses it through your living room window, which shatters and pelts you with shards of glass until you stagger into the street and get run over by an ice cream truck.
Ever had that kind of bad day? This guy has.
If you don’t know, that’s The Walking Dead‘s Daryl Dixon, played by Norman Reedus who everyone knows from Boondock Saints (and if you say otherwise you’re a lying hipster).
On the “Chupacabra” episode that aired a couple of weeks ago, Daryl had a bad day unlike any other. Hell, one could call it a downright shitty day.
While the others were dealing with emotional problems, Daryl was out being the best part of the show as usual, searching for Sophia on horseback. While doing that, here’s what happened to him:
- His horse, who we later found out was named Nelly, as in Nervous Nelly (real fuckin’ funny, Hershel), was spooked by a rattlesnake, bucking Daryl off. He rolled down a hill into a river.
- Upon landing in that muddy river, Daryl notices he has pierced his side with one of his own crossbow bolts.
- He passes out only to wake up with a zombie (don’t say that!) gnawing on his boot. He beats that one senseless while another attacks him.
- To kill the second walker, Daryl has to pull the bolt through himself, load it in the bow and fire it through the ugly bugger’s head.
- He tries to climb the hill, falling down again.
- Finally, he climbs the hill successfully, making his way back to camp.
- Thinking him a walker, Andrea shoots him in the head.
So think about that next time it’s slightly cooler than plus fifteen. Or your internet is slow. It could be a whole lot worse.
But, if ever you have a day on par, feel free to say, “Ugh, I am having such a Daryl Dixon day.
On other Walking Dead notes, apparently some people (see: conservative morons) had a problem with Lori considering getting rid of her child. That’s right, they had a problem with a woman (a bit misguidedly, granted) taking emergency contraceptives on a show where the dead come back to life.
This Sunday is the mid-season finale, an episode that is supposed to be the “one to watch.” So to hold you over until that day, here is some awesome Walking Dead stuff the interwebs had to offer us.
Let’s Be Friends Again, the exceptionally excellent webcomic, ran a comic and a rant explaining their (and many others’) frustration with The Walking Dead. The comic is below, but you can read the comic and the rant here (or just click on it below to get a larger view). While you’re there, take some time and go through the rest of the comics. It’ll be worth your (or your employer’s) time.
Also, should you ever fear the Apocalypse is on it’s way (two raptures this year alone, we’re overdue for sure), you can buy a Zombie Apocalypse Kit here.